I'm dead tired. I'm feeling very overwhelmed. My TV is broken and I don't know how it's gonna get fixed or replaced on my minuscule budget but I am thankful for these feelings because it means I am alive and living my life each and every day to the best of my ability!
I went to bed late last night because I was working on a writing job that was due yesterday. I thank God for that opportunity to work. I just hope it's good enough to get another one! Having the confidence to succeed at what I am doing is my number one hurdle. I have to remind myself each and every day that I am strong enough to do anything I set my mind to. I may not be able to please everyone all the time but there are people out there that will benefit from what I have to offer. Whether that be professional or personal. I can make this business work and I will. I really don't have any choice.
So many times we wish for things and then when they happen, we don't know what to do with them or how to handle the changes. I really want this new Virtual Assistant/Freelance Writer business to work and be successful. Now I find myself struggling to make the balance of work and home life, well work! I have deadlines to meet and new business to generate yet my house is a mess and I want to spend time with my kids. I am so lucky to have my kids this week. I treasure very moment with them and get frustrated when I don't have 100% of my attention on them. Then I remind myself how blessed I am to be working from home, even if it's one or two jobs here and there. I could be away from home,unable to have my kids with me and still working to earn that oh so valuable dollar. I wouldn't be able to still drive Samantha to dance or go watch Jess' basketball game like I did tonight. The pure joy it gives me to see my son playing his heart out on that court and really enjoying himself. He lights up and pumps his fists when he scores a basket or someone else scores off his pass. No better feeling in the world to me. Or when I see Samantha dancing her very best in class. She puts her heart and soul into her dancing and I admire her passion for it. I want to have a passion like that and I will again someday. And my kids will be proud of me like I am of them.
If the TV can't be fixed, I'll get another one. Maybe it won't be as big or technical but I will provide one for my family. It is nice not having it work. Maybe we will be reminded of what it means to spend time together as a family again. Just talking about our day, playing games, reading or listening to music. Maybe or the kids will just go out and play with their friends and be happier than they would be in front of the TV anyway.